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ISSN: 1525-898X
Observations by and for the vaguely disenchanted by Kevin G. Barkes

 

Conceived above a saloon, delivered into this world by a masked man identified by his heavily sedated mother as Captain Video, raised by a kindly West Virginian woman, a mild-mannered former reporter with modest delusions of grandeur and no tolerance of idiots and the intellectually dishonest.

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network solutions made me a child pornographer!
The sordid details...

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Anniversary

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Requiem for a fictional Scotsman

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Oh my God! They killed Library!! Those bastards!!!

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Elegy to a Mostly Maine Coon

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It's a Hap-Hap-Happy Day

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A Pittsburgher in the Really Big City

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Da Burg Annat

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I Have Issues

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Yeah, yeah, I'm inspired

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At least the rivers freeze in Pittsburgh

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He knows if yinz is a jagoff

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Please support KGB Report by making your amazon.com purchases through our affiliate link:
 

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dcl dialogue online!

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no. we're not that kgb.

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KGB, CIA linked

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The Carbolic Smoke Ball
Superb satire, and based in Pittsburgh!

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Americans United for Separation of Church and State

"No religious Test shall ever be required as a Qualification to any Office or public Trust under the United States."
Article VI, U.S. Constitution

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Geek of the Week, 7/16/2000

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Cruel Site of the Day, 7/15/2000

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miscellany

Hard to describe.

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"a breezy writing style and a cool mix of tidbits"

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Our riveting and morally compelling...

Privacy statement

One of  52,045 random quotes. Please CTRL-F5 to refresh the page.

	kgbreport.com Web

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(July 2000 and earlier)

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Saturday, August 15, 2009
posted by KGB at 12:01 AM (permalink)

Photo of the day

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Friday, August 14, 2009
posted by KGB at 7:44 AM (permalink)

Hypocrisy of the day

The Daily Show With Jon Stewart	Mon - Thurs 11p / 10c
Glenn Beck's Operation
www.thedailyshow.com
Daily Show Full Episodes Political Humor Spinal Tap Performance

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posted by KGB at 2:17 AM (permalink)

Time waster of the day

I was headed to bed a half hour ago. Then I stumbled over this.

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Thursday, August 13, 2009
posted by KGB at 12:33 AM (permalink)

Quote of the day

When it comes to casting stones, he who is without sin will tend to have minimal hand-eye coordination.
-The Covert Comic

Speaking of whom, our far-from-average spook comments on yesterday's quote collection:

"Ivan Stang said: 'We all know how stupid the average person is. Now realize that, by definition, fifty percent of the population is dumber than that.'

"Bad news for Ivan Stang: he's actually referring to the median person."
-John Alejandro King

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Wednesday, August 12, 2009
posted by KGB at 12:01 AM (permalink)

On average...

The IQ and the life expectancy of the average American recently passed each other going in opposite directions.
-George Carlin

The best argument against democracy is a five-minute conversation with the average voter.
-Winston Churchill

Applause, mingled with boos and hisses, is about all that the average voter is able or willing to contribute to public life.
-Elmer Davis

The average person thinks he isn't.
-Father Larry Lorenzoni

The average man doesn't want to be free. He wants to be safe.
-H.L. Mencken

The average man never really thinks from beginning to end of his life. The mental activity of such people is only a mouthing of cliches. What they mistake for thought is simply repetition of what they have heard. My guess is that well over 80% of the human race goes through life without having a single original thought. Whenever a new one appears the average man shows signs of dismay and resentment.
-H.L. Mencken

The average American has the attention span of a ferret on double espresso.
-Dennis Miller

You won't find average Americans on the left or on the right. You'll find them at Kmart.
-Zell Miller

People vote their resentment, not their appreciation. The average man does not vote for anything but against something.
-H.H. Munro (Saki)

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people.
-Eleanor Roosevelt

Half of the people in the world are below average.
-The National Review

Think of how dumb the average person is. Half of everyone is even dumber than that!
-Unattributed

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Tuesday, August 11, 2009
posted by KGB at 6:39 AM (permalink)

Obama Death Panel Debate

The Daily Show With Jon Stewart	Mon - Thurs 11p / 10c
Healther Skelter - Obama Death Panel Debate
www.thedailyshow.com
Daily Show Full Episodes Political Humor Spinal Tap Performance

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posted by KGB at 6:29 AM (permalink)

Angrytown, USA

The Daily Show With Jon Stewart	Mon - Thurs 11p / 10c
Healther Skelter
www.thedailyshow.com
Daily Show Full Episodes Political Humor Spinal Tap Performance

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Monday, August 10, 2009
posted by KGB at 2:20 PM (permalink)

Craig explains it all

h/t to Leslie, whose birthday is tomorrow.

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posted by KGB at 1:31 AM (permalink)

Remembering Isaac Hayes (d. 8/10/08)

What's that spinning sound?

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Sunday, August 09, 2009
posted by KGB at 12:01 AM (permalink)

Thoughts for a Sunday morning...

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Copyright © 1987-2024 by Kevin G. Barkes
All rights reserved.
Violators will be prosecuted.
So there.  
The kgb@kgb.com e-mail address is now something other than kgb@kgb.com saga.
kgbreport.com used to be kgb.com until December, 2007 when the domain name broker Trout Zimmer made an offer I couldn't refuse. Giving up kgb.com and adopting kgbreport.com created a significant problem, however. I had acquired the kgb.com domain name in 1993, and had since that time used kgb@kgb.com as my sole e-mail address. How to let people know that kgb@kgb.com was no longer kgb@kgb.com but rather kgbarkes@gmail.com which is longer than kgb@kgb.com and more letters to type than kgb@kgb.com and somehow less aesthetically pleasing than kgb@kgb.com but actually just as functional as kgb@kgb.com? I sent e-mails from the kgb@kgb.com address to just about everybody I knew who had used kgb@kgb.com in the past decade and a half but noticed that some people just didn't seem to get the word about the kgb@kgb.com change. So it occurred to me that if I were generate some literate, valid text in which kgb@kgb.com was repeated numerous times and posted it on a bunch of different pages- say, a blog indexed by Google- that someone looking for kgb@kgb.com would notice this paragraph repeated in hundreds of locations, would read it, and figure out that kgb@kgb.com no longer is the kgb@kgb.com they thought it was. That's the theory, anyway. kgb@kgb.com. Ok, I'm done. Move along. Nothing to see here...