Granddaughter Joelle nailed it.
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Honoré de Balzac »
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Every love is the love before
In a duller dress.
-Dorothy Parker
If love is blind, why is Victoria's Secret so successful?
-Unattributed
If love is the answer, could you rephrase the question?
-Jane
Wagner
Life is one fool thing after another where as love is two fool things
after each other.
-Oscar Wilde
Love doesn't make the world go 'round. Love is what makes the ride
worthwhile.
-Franklin P. Jones
Love is a decision, not an emotion.
-Unattributed
Love is a joint experience between two persons- but the fact that it is
a joint experience does not mean that it is a similar experience to the
two people involved.
-Carson McCullers
Love is a matter of chemistry. Sex is a matter of physics.
-Unattributed
Love is a perky elf dancing a merry little jig, and then suddenly he
turns on you with a miniature machine gun.
-Matt Groening
Love is a series
Of darlings and dearies
Of honeys and sweeties
And
sugared entreaties
Of moonings and spoonings
And cooings and
billings
All tempered, of course,
By occasional killings.
-E.Y.
Harburg
Love is a snowmobile racing across the tundra. Suddenly it flips over,
pinning you underneath. At night, the ice weasels come.
-Matt
Groening
Love is a verb.
-Clare Boothe Luce
Love is all fun and games until someone loses an eye or gets pregnant.
-Jim
Cole
Love is blind, but desire just doesn't give a good goddamn.
-James
Thurber
Love is grand; divorce is three hundred grand.
-Unattributed
Love is like an hourglass, with the heart filling up as the brain
empties.
-Jules Renard
Love is like any other luxury. You have no right to it unless you can
afford it.
-Anthony Trollope
Love is like epidemic diseases. The more one fears it, the more likely
one is to contract it.
-Nicolas Chamfort
Love is like the measles; we all have to go through it.
-Jerome K.
Jerome
Love is not the dying moan of a distant violin- it's the triumphant
twang of a bedspring.
-S.J. Perelman
Love is one long sweet dream, and marriage is the alarm clock.
-Unattributed
Love is only the dirty trick played on us to achieve continuation of the
species.
-W. Somerset Maugham
Love is that rare attraction to someone that can survive getting to know
them.
-Robert Brault
Love is the condition in which the happiness of another person is
essential to your own.
-Robert A. Heinlein
Love is the triumph of imagination over intelligence.
-H.L. Mencken
Love is the word used to label the sexual excitement of the young, the
habituation of the middle-aged, and the mutual dependence of the old.
-John
Ciardi
Love, and you shall be loved. All love is mathematically just, as much
as the two sides of an algebraic equation.
-Ralph Waldo Emerson
Marriage, friends, is a lifelong feast, love is no light lunch.
-Garrison
Keillor
Oh, life is a glorious cycle of song,
A medley of extemporanea;
And
love is a thing that can never go wrong;
And I am Marie of Romania.
-Dorothy
Parker
Oh, love isn't there to make us happy. I believe it exists to show us
how much we can endure.
-Hermann Hesse
Puppy love is no laughing matter when you're a puppy.
-Amy Gamerman
The best proof of love is trust.
-Dr. Joyce Brothers
The enemy of a love is never outside, it's not a man or woman, it's what
we lack in ourselves.
-Anaïs Nin
The first duty of love is to listen.
-Paul Tillich
The first sigh of love is the last of wisdom.
-Antoine Bret
The great secret of happiness in love is to be glad that the other
fellow married her.
-H.L. Mencken
The magic of first love is our ignorance that it can ever end.
-Benjamin
Disraeli
True love is the best thing in the world, except for cough drops.
-William
Goldman
When you have been just told that the girl you love is definitely
betrothed to another, you begin to understand how Anarchists must feel
when the bomb goes off too soon.
-P.G. Wodehouse
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2014 will bring granddaughter Joelle's first birthday and my 60th. We both plan to make the most of it. You should, too.
2013 was, I believe, the first year in which I didn't miss a single daily KGB Report post. Whether that's an accomplishment worth celebrating s a determination best left to the reader.
In any event, sincere wishes for a healthy and prosperous new year, and thanks for reading!
Categories: Holidays, KGB Family, New Years
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May this arbitrary, transient aspect of your solipsistic discernment of
the space-time continuum delineate the initiation of a procession of
random events which trend in a manner you perceive as favorable.
-Kevin
G. Barkes
An optimist stays up until midnight to see the new year in. A pessimist
stays up to make sure the old year leaves.
-Bill Vaughan
Be at war with your vices, at peace with your neighbors, and let every
new year find you a better man.
-Benjamin Franklin
Celebrate what you want to see more of.
-Tom Peters
Drop the last year into the silent limbo of the past. Let it go, for it
was imperfect, and thank God that it can go.
-Brooks Atkinson
Every New Year is the direct descendant, isn't it, of a long line of
proven criminals?
-Ogden Nash
For last year's words belong to last year's language and next year's
words await another voice.
-T.S. Eliot
Good resolutions are simply checks that men draw on a bank where they
have no account.
-Oscar Wilde
He who breaks a resolution is a weakling; He who makes one is a fool.
-F.M.
Knowles
I have never heard anything about the resolutions of the apostles, but a
good deal about their acts.
-Horace Mann
I made no resolutions for the New Year. The habit of making plans, of
criticizing, sanctioning and molding my life, is too much of a daily
event for me.
-Anaïs Nin
I think in terms of the day's resolutions, not the year's.
-Henry
Moore
Many years ago I resolved never to bother with New Year's resolutions,
and I've stuck with it ever since.
-Dave Beard
May all your troubles last as long as your New Year's resolutions.
-Joey
Adams
New Year's Day... now is the accepted time to make your regular annual
good resolutions. Next week you can begin paving hell with them as usual.
-Mark
Twain
New Year's Eve is like every other night; there is no pause in the march
of the universe, no breathless moment of silence among created things
that the passage of another twelve months may be noted; and yet no man
has quite the same thoughts this evening that come with the coming of
darkness on other nights.
-Hamilton Wright Mabie
New Year's Resolution: To tolerate fools more gladly, provided this does
not encourage them to take up more of my time.
-James Agate
New Years Eve: when the beautiful promise of tomorrow is transformed
into the ugly reality of today, and the disgusting miasma of now becomes
the rosy nostalgic netherworlds of yesterday.
-J.C. Duffy
Resolutions, like the good, die young.
-Fulton J. Sheen
The proper behavior all through the holiday season is to be drunk. This
drunkenness culminates on New Year's Eve, when you get so drunk you kiss
the person you're married to.
-P.J. O'Rourke
Time has no divisions to mark its passage; there is never a thunderstorm
to announce the beginning of a new year. It is only we mortals who ring
bells and fire off pistols.
-Thomas Mann
Write it on your heart that every day is the best day in the year.
-Ralph
Waldo Emerson
Year's end is neither an end nor a beginning but a going on, with all
the wisdom that experience can instill in us.
-Hal Borland
Yesterday, everybody smoked his last cigar, took his last drink and
swore his last oath. Today, we are a pious and exemplary community.
Thirty days from now, we shall have cast our reformation to the winds
and gone to cutting our ancient shortcomings considerably shorter than
ever.
-Mark Twain
Your success and happiness lies in you. Resolve to keep happy, and your
joy and you shall form an invincible host against difficulties.
-Helen
Keller
Youth is when you're allowed to stay up late on New Year's Eve. Middle
age is when you're forced to.
-Bill Vaughan
Categories: Holidays, New Years, Quotes on a topic, Resolutions
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Granddaugter Joelle's first Christmas.
Wishing yours is as much fun.
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Riley has visions of sugarplums dancing in his head.
Sassy knows the fat guy with the beard
will give her cookies.
And maybe Santa will, too!
Merry Christmas from Kevin, Cindy,
and all the furry minions.
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(Photo: The Grey
Lodge Pub)
Festivus, a well-celebrated parody, has become a secular holiday celebrated on December 23 which serves as an alternative to participating in the pressures and commercialism of the Christmas holiday season. Originally a family tradition of scriptwriter Dan O'Keefe working on the American sitcom Seinfeld, the holiday entered popular culture after it was made the focus of a 1997 episode of the program. The holiday's celebration, as it was shown on Seinfeld, includes a Festivus dinner, an unadorned aluminum "Festivus pole," practices such as the "Airing of Grievances" and "Feats of Strength," and the labeling of easily explainable events as "Festivus miracles."
(YouTube video: "Seinfeld")
"The tradition of Festivus begins... with the airing of grievances!"
Categories: Dan O'Keefe, Festivus, Holidays, Seinfeld, Video, YouTube
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Categories: Batman, Christmas, Christopher Walken, Church and State, Civil Rights, Cleaning off the desktop, Congress, Fox News, Holidays, Politics
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Granddaughter Joelle and Santa meet for the first time. Both seem favorably impressed.
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It's surprising what pops up on Google...
It's U.S. Patent #7,249,057 B2, issued July 24, 2007: "Product Information Supplying Method, Product Information Acquiring Method, Product Information Registering Method And Recording Medium," and the description is equally enlightening:
"There is provided a product information supply method for supplying a user who desires to purchase a product with proper information about a related product that could be bought in combination with the product, so that the user is assisted in purchasing products. Registration of combination information to be supplied to the user is made with a database managed by a service provider server by a person who has bought the above product by means of a registration page so that a lot of combination information is accumulated in the database. The registered information includes not only information specifying a combinable product but also information about the effects of the combination and the ways of using products in combination. The database is searched in response to inquiry information from the user who makes reference to a page of products. Thus, corresponding combination information is extracted from the database and is sent to the user."
I'm no expert in intellectual property law, but- this is something patentable? A database of related products, with the added twist of returning information on "effects of the combination and the ways of using products in combination." You mean like peanut butter and jelly? Gin and tonic? Water and Alka-Seltzer tablets?
Even more puzzling is the reference to one of my old DEC Professional DCL Dialogue columns. It deals with referrals and recommendations for computer hardware and software, but its relevance to this patent eludes me. You can read the column here.
Other stuff that passed across the desktop this week:
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Categories: Cleaning off the desktop, Computers, Holidays, Miscellany, Star Trek, Technology, WTF?
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(Paul Noth, The New Yorker)
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Youngest granddaughter Joelle (six months old) as a bumblebee entranced by a ceiling fan.
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(Published May 30, 2007 Chicago Tribune)
Garrison Keillor
Memorial Day is a lovely day in America, a day of reunion in small towns, where people drive up to the cemetery on Monday morning and file in, old-timers carrying lawn chairs, and even if you've missed a few years, people will come over and shake your hand and thank you for coming. You don't have to dress up or support the war in Iraq. You just come, and afterward there are hot dogs and potato salad at the Legion Club.
It's the last patriotic holiday that still means something, and it persists year after year despite the wooden rituals and leaden speeches. In Central Park on Monday, an admiral with a chestful of ribbons gripped the lectern and read his lines, and the line of his that got quoted was, "Their sacrifice has enabled us to enjoy the things that we, I think in many cases, take for granted," which does not ring, does it? No.
"Their sacrifice has enabled us to enjoy the things that many of us take for granted" would have been better, but still it's nothing people will take home with them and ponder. How about, "Their noble sacrifice has enabled us to see the ignobility of the leadership that sent them to their deaths"? How about, "We have sacrificed enough of our young men and women and it is time to bring them home to enjoy the things that the rest of us take for granted"?
The Current Occupant drove over the bridge to Arlington and spoke at the Tomb of the Unknowns, a site of powerful reverence, and his speechwriter, in a hurry to finish and enjoy his weekend, gave him, "From their deaths must come a world where the cruel dreams of tyrants and terrorists are frustrated and foiled -- where our nation is more secure from attack, and where the gift of liberty is secured for millions who have never known it," a line cobbled together from scrap lumber. Shades of "the last full measure of devotion" and "we here highly resolve that these dead shall not have died in vain" but made from different cloth. The reputation of the Gettysburg Address remains secure.
Dishonesty makes for poor rhetoric and that's what has gutted this beautiful holiday. The ideas it celebrates- that our young men and women did their duty and died in defense of their country- are simply not true. Vietnam was lost and it didn't matter to the security of the United States. Saigon fell and life in the States went on without a blink. And since the end of selective service, these honored dead are somebody else's sons and daughters, not ours- one good reason why there is so little protest of this war: If the Army were conscripting our children to go to Baghdad, the Occupant's approval rating would be in the low teens.
Memorial Day survives on the faint memories of World War II, the Good War. Those old Legion and VFW guys are the ones who keep it going. Some come in fatigues, some ride in golf carts past the rows of tombstones and the urns with fresh gardenias planted in them, and the Boy Scouts line up, and the auxiliary ladies in blue hand out little American flags. There is a distant HEE-YUP and the crowd shushes and the honor guard marches in, left, right, left, right, left, right, and Old Glory is raised on the flagpole, and we all recite the Pledge of Allegiance. The names of the dead are read and wreaths of poppies are placed and maybe somebody recites "In Flanders Fields":
In Flanders Fields the poppies blow,
Between the crosses, row on row,
That
mark our place; and in the sky,
The larks, still bravely singing, fly,
Scarce
heard amid the guns below.
Everyone is a little stiff and self-consciously reverent. And then comes the speech. That's the problem. It is time for the truth to be told and we cannot bring ourselves to tell it. Good men and women were sacrificed to the vanity of politicians and generals. It is a miserable business to tell lies over the graves of good soldiers, but we do, and then we all sing "America the Beautiful," including the verse about heroes proved in liberating strife, and the honor guard fires its rifle salute and somebody presses Play on a boombox and we hear taps and the guard turns about-face and marches off and we walk away, thoughtfully, and there is much to think about.
(Garrison Keillor is an author and host of "A Prairie Home Companion.")
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Danny Shanahan nails it again.
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(Copyright © 2002, David Farley)
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'Tis the season...
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KGB Report welcomes you to 2013: May this arbitrary, transient point in your solipsistic sense of the space-time continuum delineate the initiation of a series of random events which trend in a manner which you perceive to be favorable.
Categories: Barack Obama, Cartoons, Elections, History, Holidays, Mass shootings, New Years, Photo of the day, Politics, Second Amendment, The Big Bang Theory, U.S. Constitution, WTF?
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2013 is the first year since 1987 that contains four different numbers.
You're welcome.
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Kids, dogs, and snow. Granddaugter Lea and her best bud Bella enjoy the precipitation up north near Tionesta.
.
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Potential KGB Report Christmas card.
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...are probably best forgotten...
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WKRP in Cincinnati: "Turkeys Away" (Season 1, Episode 7, aired 10/30/1978)
Mr. Carlson is beginning to feel useless at the new formatted rock station so he
decides to create a big Thanksgiving Day promotion. His idea? Get a helicopter,
with a banner attached to it saying "Happy Thanksgiving From WKRP", and drop
live turkeys from the helicopter. What could go wrong?
(YouTube video: "The turkeys are hitting the ground like sacks of wet cement!")
See the full episode on Hulu.
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(From Facebook)
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You've heard of the wolf spider, but how about the spider wolf?
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Put on a hat. Run around in the grass. Pursue happiness.
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Honoré de Balzac »
