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Published Sunday, May 17, 2015 @ 7:33 PM EDT
May 17 2015

A house is no home unless it contain food and fire for the mind as well as for the body.
-Margaret Fuller

A man travels the world over in search of what he needs, and returns home to find it.
-George Moore

A man would rather come home to an unmade bed and a happy woman than to a neatly made bed and an angry woman.
-Marlene Dietrich

A man's home may seem to be his castle on the outside; inside is more often his nursery.
-Clare Boothe Luce

A mind, like a home, is furnished by its owner, so if one's life is cold and bare he can blame none but himself.
-Louis L'Amour

All the average human being asks is something he can call a home; a family that is fed and warm; and now and then a little happiness; once in a long while an extravagance.
-Mary Harris Jones (Mother Jones)

Although the sun shine, leave not thy cloak at home.
-George Herbert

Always be nice to your children because they are the ones who will choose your rest home.
-Phyllis Diller

America is the only country in the world where you can suffer culture shock without leaving home.
-Florence King

Art is the only way to run away without leaving home.
-Twyla Tharp

As the world gets dumber and dumber, I feel more and more at home.
-Peter McWilliams

At home I am a nice guy; but I don't want the world to know. Humble people, I've found, don't get very far.
-Muhammad Ali

Basically, I believe the world is a jungle, and if it's not a bit of a jungle in the home, a child cannot possibly be fit to enter the outside world.
-Bette Davis

Christmas is a time when you get homesick, even when you're home.
-Carol Nelson

Death is a friend of ours; and he that is not ready to entertain him is not at home.
-Francis Bacon

Do you know what it means to come home at night to a woman who'll give you a little love, a little affection, a little tenderness? It means you're in the wrong house.
-George Burns

Education, like neurosis, begins at home.
-Milton R. Sapirstein

Half of all home accidents happen in the kitchen, and the family has to eat them.
-Sam Ewing

Heaven is home. Utopia is here. Nirvana is now.
-Edward Abbey

Home is heaven and orgies are vile, but you need an orgy once in a while.
-Ogden Nash

Home is not where you live but where they understand you.
-Christian Morganstern

Home is the place we love best and grumble the most.
-Billy Sunday

Home is the place where, when you have to go there, they have to take you in.
-Robert Frost

Home is where somebody notices when you are no longer there.
-Alexsandr Hemon

Home is where you hang your @.
-Unattributed

Home is where you hang your head.
-Groucho Marx

Home was quite a place when people stayed there.
-E.B. White

Human beings are the only creatures that allow their children to come back home.
-Bill Cosby

I feel most at home in the United States, not because it is intrinsically a more interesting country, but because no one really belongs there any more than I do. We are all there together in its wholly excellent vacuum.
-Wyndham Lewis

I must go home periodically to renew my sense of horror.
-Carson McCullers

I take my children everywhere, but they always find their way back home.
-Robert Orben

I would have gone home to my mother, but I'm not that crazy about my mother.
-Cher

If charity begins at home, I bet I know in which room.
-John Alejandro King (The Covert Comic)

If I'm not in bed by eleven, I go home.
-Henny Youngman

If you reject the food, ignore the customs, fear the religion and avoid the people, you might better stay home.
-James A. Michener

Is it possible that existence is our exile and nothingness our home?
-Emile Cioran

Is it time to go home yet? I keep clicking these damn shoes, but nothing happens.
-Robin Hecht

It was the policy of the good old gentleman to make his children feel that home was the happiest place in the world; and I value this delicious home-feeling as one of the choicest gifts a parent can bestow.
-Washington Irving

It's true you can't go home again, although evidently your relatives can come to your home as often as they want.
-John Alejandro King (The Covert Comic)

Justice was born outside the home and a long way from it; and it has never been adopted there.
-Walter Cronkite

Let woman out of the home, let man into it, should be the aim of education. The home needs man, and the world outside needs woman.
-Pearl S. Buck

Marrying a man is like buying something you've been admiring for a long time in a shop window. You may love it when you get it home, but it doesn't always go with everything else in the house.
-Jean Kerr

Of all the home remedies, a good wife is the best.
-Frank McKinney (Kin) Hubbard

One of television's great contributions is that it brought murder back into the home, where it belongs.
-Alfred Hitchcock

Owning your own home is America's unique recipe for avoiding revolution and promoting pseudo-equality at the same time. To keep citizens puttering in their yards instead of sputtering on the barricades, the government has gladly deprived itself of billions in tax revenues by letting home 'owners' deduct mortgage interest payments.
-Florence King

Television enables you to be entertained in your home by people you wouldn't have in your home.
-David Frost

The average man's expectations of a home are minimal: warmth, food, clean shirts, not too many questions asked, and sex when necessary.
-Irma Kurtz

The best way to keep children at home is to make the home atmosphere pleasant, and let the air out of their tires.
-Dorothy Parker

The ideal home: big enough for you to hear the children, but not very well.
-Mignon McLaughlin

The outside world doesn't have a lot to offer. You have to make your own heaven in your own home.
-Bette Midler

The power of finding beauty in the humblest things makes home happy and life lovely.
-Louisa May Alcott

The strength of a nation derives from the integrity of the home.
-Confucius

The voices in my head told me to stay home and clean my guns.
-Unattributed

The worst feeling in the world is the homesickness that comes over a man occasionally when he is at home.
-E.W. Howe

The worst thing about work in the house or home is that whatever you do it is destroyed, laid waste or eaten within twenty-four hours.
-Lady Hasluck

There's no need for a piece of sculpture in a home that has a cat.
-Wesley Bates

To feel at home, stay at home.
-Clifton Fadiman

We are all strangers in a strange land, longing for home, but not quite knowing what or where home is. We glimpse it sometimes in our dreams, or as we turn a corner, and suddenly there is a strange, sweet familiarity that vanishes almost as soon as it comes...
-Madeleine L'Engle

We live in an age when pizza gets to your home before the police.
-Jeff Marder

When you finally go back to your old hometown, you find it wasn't the old home you missed but your childhood.
-Sam Ewing

Where we love is home, home that our feet may leave, but not our hearts.
-Oliver Wendell Holmes, Sr.

You show me a woman who hasn't fantasized getting in a car and leaving home and I'll show you a woman who doesn't drive.
-Susan Sussman

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(Also born on May 18: Bertrand Russell and Tina Fey.)


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