A father is a thing that is forced to endure childbirth, without an
anesthetic.
-Paul Harvey
A father is someone who carries pictures where his money used to
be.
-Unattributed
A good father lives so he is a credit to his children.
-Arnold
H. Glasow
A realist is a man who insists on making the same mistakes his
grandfather did.
-Benjamin Disraeli
All fathers are invisible in daytime; daytime is ruled by mothers and
fathers come out at night. Darkness brings home fathers, with their
real, unspeakable power. There is more to fathers than meets the
eye.
-Martin Atwood
By the time a man realizes that maybe his father was right, he usually
has a son who thinks he's wrong.
-Laurence J. Peter
Dad always thought laughter was the best medicine, which I guess was
why several of us died of tuberculosis.
-Jack Handey
Diogenes struck the father when the son swore, because he taught him
no better.
-Robert Burton
Every father says the same thing: 'Where's your mother?'
-Bill
Cosby
Every generation revolts against its fathers and makes friends with
its grandfathers.
-Lewis Mumford
Father's Day is like Mother's Day, except the gift is cheaper.
-
Gerald F. Lieberman
Fatherhood is great because you can ruin someone from scratch.
-Jon Stewart
Fathers are biological necessities, but social accidents.
-Margaret Mead
Fathers have a unique and irreplaceable role in the lives of
children.
-George W. Bush
For years I thought my father was a hunchback. Turns out he didn't
know suspenders were adjustable.
-Bill Kelly
Humor is always based on a modicum of truth. Have you ever heard a
joke about a father-in-law?
-Dick Clark
I believe that what we become depends on what our fathers teach us at
odd moments, when they aren't trying to teach us. We are formed by
little scraps of wisdom.
-Umberto Eco
I come from a different generation from my Dad.
-George W. Bush
I talk and talk and talk, and I haven't taught people in 50 years what
my father taught by example in one week.
-Mario Cuomo
I tell the truth, and it has gotten me into a lot of trouble. My dad
used to say to me, 'If you tell the truth all day long, you will end
up in jail.'
-Elaine Stritch
I've always followed my father's advice: he told me, first to always
keep my word and, second, to never insult anybody unintentionally. If
I insult you, you can be goddamn sure I intend to. And, third, he told
me not to go around looking for trouble.
-John Wayne
If a child looks like his father, that's heredity. If he looks like a
neighbor, that's environment.
-Unattributed
It doesn't matter who my father was; it matters who I remember he
was.
-Anne Sexton
It is almost nicer being a godfather than a father, like having white
mice but making your nanny feed them for you.
-Theodore H.
White
It is impossible to please all the world and one's father.
-Jean
de la Fontaine
Men are all right for friends, but as soon as you marry them they turn
into cranky old fathers, even the wild ones.
-Willa Cather
My father had a profound influence on me. He was a lunatic.
-
Spike Milligan
My father was frightened of his father, I was frightened of my father,
and I am damned well going to see to it that my children are
frightened of me.
-King George V
My wife is so analytical with raising kids, and I am not. My feeling
is if they turn out good, then that means I was a good daddy and put a
lot of effort into it. If they turn out bad, it means they took after
her side of the family.
-Jeff Foxworthy
No man is responsible for his father. That is entirely his mother's
affair.
-Margaret Turnbull
Noble fathers have noble children.
-Euripides
Nobody talks more of free enterprise and competition and of the best
man winning than the man who inherited his father's store or
farm.
-C. Wright Mills
One father is enough to govern one hundred sons, but not a hundred
sons one father.
-George Herbert
Rich men's sons are seldom rich men's fathers.
-Herbert
Kaufmann
The fundamental defect of fathers is that they want their children to
be a credit to them.
-Bertrand Russell
The moral code which was good enough for our fathers is not good
enough for our children.
-Marie von Ebner-Eschenbach
The time not to become a father is eighteen years before a
war.
-E.B. White
The wisest man may be a blind father.
-Jules Verne
The worst misfortune that can happen to an ordinary man is to have an
extraordinary father.
-Austin O'Malley
Wise children always choose a mother who was a shocking flirt in her
maiden days, and so had several offers before she accepted their
fortunate papa.
-J.M. Barrie
You know when you're young, you think your dad's Superman. Then you
grow up and you realize he's just a regular guy who wears a
cape.
-Dave Atell
(June 20 is also the birthday of Lillian Hellman.)
Categories: Fathers, Quotes of the day, Quotes on a topic
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