A lot of people believe that if everybody just did what they were told- obeyed- everything would be fine. But that's not what life is all about. That's not real. It's never going to happen.
--Matt Groening
Ah, sweet pity. Where would my love life be without it?
--Matt Groening
Are we alone in an uncaring universe, or is God some kind of wiseguy?
--Matt Groening
Cartooning is for people who can't quite draw and can't quite write. You combine the two half-talents and come up with a career.
--Matt Groening
Everybody doesn't have to get every joke. People really appreciate not being condescended to.
--Matt Groening
Families are about love overcoming emotional torture.
--Matt Groening
God often gives nuts to toothless people.
--Matt Groening
I can't believe it! Reading and writing actually paid off!
--Matt Groening
I don't know why I did it, I don't know why I enjoyed it, and I don't know why I will do it again.
--Matt Groening
I judge my life by how miserable it used to be. If I could pay my rent, I was deliriously happy. Now I'm deliriously happy all the time.
--Matt Groening
I plead alignment to the flakes of the untitled snakes of a merry cow and to the republicrats for which they scam: one nacho, underpants with licorice and jugs of wine for owls.
--Matt Groening
I'll keep it short and sweet- Family. Religion. Friendship. These are the three demons you must slay if you wish to succeed in business.
--Matt Groening
If Casper is a Friendly Ghost, where did they bury the body of Casper the Friendly Dead Kid?
--Matt Groening
It's just hard not to listen to TV: it's spent so much more time raising us than parents have.
--Matt Groening
Love is a perky elf dancing a merry little jig, and then suddenly he turns on you with a miniature machine gun.
--Matt Groening
Love is a snowmobile racing across the tundra. Suddenly it flips over, pinning you underneath. At night, the ice weasels come.
--Matt Groening
Most TV shows don't reward you for paying attention.
--Matt Groening
Romance is dead. It was acquired in a hostile takeover by Hallmark and Disney, homogenized, and sold off piece by piece.
--Matt Groening
What if we chose the wrong religion? Each week we just make God madder and madder.
--Matt Groening
When authorities warn you of the sinfulness of sex, there is an important lesson to be learned. Do not have sex with the authorities.
--Matt Groening
When you do things right, people won't be sure you've done anything at all.
--Matt Groening
You should listen to your heart, and not the voices in your head.
--Matt Groening
Found 22 occurence(s) in 51,848 quotation(s).