Adolescence is just one big walking pimple.
Because nobody goes through life without a scar.
Celebrity was a long time in coming; it will go away. Everything goes away.
Comedy is tragedy plus time.
Have you noticed that all you need to grow healthy, vigorous grass is a crack in your sidewalk? Having a baby is like taking your lower lip and forcing it over your head.
I think we're here for each other.
If someone tells you that you cannot do something and you believe it, they are right.
It's almost impossible to be funnier than the people in Washington.
No one ever said life was fair. Just eventful.
Only I can change my life. No one can do it for me.
The audience is never wrong.
We don't stop going to school when we graduate.
When you have a dream, you've got to grab it and never let go.
Words, once they are printed, have a life of their own.
You do have to love your kids enough to let them hate you. But it's the disease that's hating you, not them.
You have to go through the falling down in order to learn to walk. It helps to know that you can survive it. That's an education in itself.
You have to have faith that there is a reason you go through certain things. I can't say I'm glad to go through pain, but in a way one must, in order to gain courage and really feel joy.
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