A gentleman is a man who can play the accordion but doesn't.
--Tom Waits
Champagne for my real friends and real pain for my sham friends.
--Tom Waits
Come down off the cross, we can use the wood.
--Tom Waits
Don't you know there ain't no devil, there's just God when he's drunk.
--Tom Waits
I knew him when he was nothing and he hasn't changed a bit.
--Tom Waits
I like beautiful melodies telling me terrible things.
--Tom Waits
I'm not a percussionist, I just like to hit things.
--Tom Waits
I've been riding on the crest of a slump lately.
--Tom Waits
I've lost my equilibrium, my car keys, and my pride.
--Tom Waits
If I exorcise my devils, well, my angels may leave too.
--Tom Waits
If there's one thing you can say about mankind, there's nothing kind about man.
--Tom Waits
If you get far enough away you'll be on your way back home.
--Tom Waits
Most of the people I admire, they usually smell funny and don't get out much.
--Tom Waits
The large print giveth, and the small print taketh away.
--Tom Waits
The way you do anything is the way you do everything.
--Tom Waits
The world is a hellish place, and bad writing is destroying the quality of our suffering. It cheapens and degrades the human experience, when it should inspire and elevate.
--Tom Waits
There are only two things you can throw out the window of a moving car, legally... Water. And feathers. Everything else you can get in trouble for.
--Tom Waits
There is no such thing as nonfiction. There is no such thing as truth. People who really know what happened aren't talking. And the people who don't have a clue, you can't shut them up.
--Tom Waits
There's nothing that you can say that will mean the same thing once it's been repeated.
--Tom Waits
We are buried beneath the weight of information, which is being confused with knowledge; quantity is being confused with abundance and wealth with happiness. We are monkeys with money and guns.
--Tom Waits
You can learn a lot about a woman by getting smashed with her.
--Tom Waits
You shouldn't play the piano with money in your pocket. Play like you need the money.
--Tom Waits
Found 22 occurence(s) in 52,059 quotation(s).