I have learned from my mistakes, and I am sure I can repeat them exactly
I met a man at a party. He said 'I'm writing a novel' I said 'Oh really? Neither am I.'
I went to the University of Life and was chucked out.
I would much prefer to be a judge than a coal miner because of the absence of falling coal.
Job was what you'd technically describe as a loony.
Life is a matter of passing the time enjoyably. There may be other things in life, but I've been too busy passing my time enjoyably to think very deeply about them.
One of the ways to avoid being beaten by the system is to laugh at it.
The garden of Eden was a boggy swamp just south of Croydon. You can see it over there.
What terrible sins I have working for me. I suppose it's the wages.
You fill me with inertia.
You know, I go to the theater to be entertained... I don't want to see plays about rape, sodomy and drug addiction... I can get all that at home.
You realize that suicide's a criminal offense- In less enlightened times they'd have hung you for it.
Found 12 occurence(s) in 52,267 quotation(s).
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